This Lent, instead of choosing to read a book of designated spirituality, I have chosen to return again to what has been my lifeline ever since I first stumbled on it by chance in the 1980's. Originally written for monastics in the sixth century many lay people like myself have found The Rule of St Benedict a source of insight and practical help in daily life. In the last couple of years there have been no less than six or eight books written on the Rule from very varying backgrounds and denominations In his recent book" The Way of St Benedict" Rowan Williams says that it gives us a set of perspectives, and that is certainly true in my experience. This short text has altered the way in which I approach my life .But above it is the vows which have challenged and supported me at every step of my Journey.

Rather to my astonishment I found that the Benedictine vows are not poverty, chastity and obedience - rather alien to most of us, with their suggestion of restriction and negativity. Instead in these vows have found the means to live fully and creatively. The first and the foundation is stability, from the Latin "stare" to stand, to stay still where I am, to be rooted and earthed in the present reality. It prevents a longing for the past or daydreaming of a future. It militates against all my escape routes: my fantasies and wandering imagination. If I know deeply and interiorly that this is the place where I stand then that unleashes great energy and does away with that inner debate and questioning that can become so debilitating. The ideal of stability runs through many sayings of the Desert Fathers: "Stay in your cell and your cell will teach you everything." And the psalms often speak of perseverance which is another way of expressing stability.

"Renew a steadfast spirit within me".. What St Benedict is asking of me is that I am rooted in God, alive and fruitful.

Because I am at home in myself I can move forward. St Benedict is a master of paradox and having told me to remain still he now asks me, in his second vow, to move forward (which is the Latin conversatio morum.") In the Prologue, his marvellous opening, St Benedict tells us to "run in the path", to "progress in this way of life", and in the Epilogue he asks "Are you hastening towards your heavenly home?" This is the interior journey that Thomas Merton lectured on in Bangkok, the day that was to end with his sudden death. "This is the most mysterious of all our vows, which is actually the most essential. I believe that it can be interpreted as a commitment to total inner transformation of one sort or another -a commitment to becoming a completely new man or woman.

This means perseverance until the end. To say that I will journey on whatever the cost, and wherever it will lead me, shows my utter reliance on God.

I cannot know the events and circumstances that lie ahead, but I am sure of the faithfulness of God, even when I am walking forward in darkness and uncertainty.

If we refuse to journey on until the day of our death we are refusing to be fully alive, and this is what St Benedict wants for all of us - to become fully alive.

To appreciate the third vow, the vow of obedience, it is important that we remember that the word comes from the Latin ob-audiens which means "listening". We have to be ready to listen with the whole of ourselves. St Benedict gives us the memorable phrase " the ear of the heart." It is the attitude, the disposition, which matters -a free, open loving response to the voice of God in whatever way it may reach us, in the written word, in the spoken word, in the stillness of our being. It is the tool by which we return to the Father - from whom we have strayed through disobedience. Again and again I find myself in the place of the prodigal, lost yet with the help of St Benedict making the return journey home to the place of acceptance and forgiveness. For right at the start, in the opening words of the Rule, St Benedict has addressed me, every one, as a beloved son or daughter.

I have found that these three promises have been deeply important in my own path of discipleship, a lifeline, a survival kit. But they also apply to any institution whose purpose is to seek God - and not least this parish. Stability brings the sense of belonging here, in this place whose story we respect and whose stones bring strength. But in order to prevent us becoming backward looking, trying to cling to the past, we must be ready to change and to move forward, and finally we must cultivate the art of listening, to one another and to the voice of Christ in and through those who worship with us here.

These vows undoubtedly enrich our human nature with their wisdom. But they are more than that. They speak of Christ

Stability: Christ the Rock on whom I build

Conversatio morum: Christ the Way I follow

Obedience: Christ the Word I hear.